How to become a stronger version of yourself for true confidence

September 17, 2020 8:00 AM EST | 5 min read

Discover how to become a critical thinker and make better decisions. Learn how to improve the quality of your thinking.

Sadly, many people don’t realize that having critical thinking skills does not mean thinking critically of themselves or others. To be a critical thinker means using rationality and evidence in problem-solving and decision-making.

Most of us (myself included on occasion), make choices and solve problems by what feels best. We’re only human. So we may find this truth-be-damned perspective emotionally satisfying – although it’s based on feelings rather than on being able to substantiate our opinions with facts.

Unfortunately, that’s NOT what critical thinking is about. In fact, emotional reactivity couldn’t be more opposite from this valuable and essential life skill. Critical thinking is a way of processing information based on evidence and what we know to be true.

Its enemies are emotions masquerading as knowledge, irrationality, and relying too much on gut or intuitive feelings (the latter have their place as adjuncts to critical thinking, but should not be mistaken for it or used in its stead).

Can one learn to be a better critical thinker? Here’s what comprises critical thinking – and how to apply in everyday decision-making.

6 tips on how to become a better critical thinker

1. Keep an open mind.

How to become a stronger version of yourself for true confidence

You can’t think critically, that is, in a discerning manner, if you’ve already made up your mind about how to solve a problem. Critical thinking means being open to ideas and concepts, which you may not have previously considered.

It means NOT shutting out new information because it happens to fly in the face of your assumptions. It involves not making up your mind until all the facts are in, nor hand-picking facts to fit into and support prior assumptions.

2. Listen more than you talk.

Listening is a vital part of learning. If we keep talking about our ideas, how will we ever learn about someone else’s?

Skilled critical thinkers are interested in others’ ideas, often more than they’re interested in their own. They want to gather new and varied information so that they can think differently. Their goal is NOT to be right, but to base actions on facts. How many of us have that outlook on life and learning?

3. Be willing to experiment.

How to become a stronger version of yourself for true confidence

It’s difficult to be or become a critical thinker if you’re afraid of making mistakes. The best thinkers are those who take ideas out on a test drive and see how they do. They are curious and ask questions: Does my idea work? Will it measure up? How does it stack up against reason and evidence?

In fact, skilled thinkers don’t view making errors in thinking as a negative judgment of themselves. They look at errors as teaching them what doesn’t work so that they can move on to what does.

4. Don’t rush to judgment.

Most of us like to get problems solved quickly. We don’t like to hem and haw and feel or see ourselves as indecisive. In part, this is because we don’t live in a culture or country that values deep, incremental thinking and measured decisions, or process over-achievement.

We like rapid fire answers so that we can make a beeline to the next question. Critical thinkers take their time and don’t feel an inner pressure to come up with an answer until they have the evidence to support it.

5. Re-assess constantly.

Humans engage in a dynamic called confirmation bias that is a substantial barrier to critical thinking. Such bias involves choosing facts to support already held assumptions and screening out those that counter what we believe.

For example: I am highly partial to Sarasota where I have lived for more than a decade. I need to work hard to take in negatives about my fair city because they go against my positive experiences. Yet, critical thinking about my city means that I must be able to take in information, which runs contrary to whatever my experience has been.

6. Seek facts

How to become a stronger version of yourself for true confidence

Most of us are more comfortable in the realm of opinion than fact. Facts are indisputable pieces of evidence. We often need to search them out. Nowhere is this truer than in the notion of truth versus “alternate facts.”

What a concept! How would that notion fly on taking high school finals, an SAT exam, or Law Boards? There may be diverse takes on statistics, where using different numbers produces different outcomes; but there are also hard, cold facts or truths which are provable and indisputable.

Often, our senses tell us one thing: It appears to the eye as if the sun actually rises and sets. However, we know that this perception is caused by the revolution of the earth turning on its axis around the sun. To be a critical thinker means setting aside perception and finding out what’s really going on.

How different the world would be if we all practiced critical thinking skills. I’ve always wished that we learned HOW to think, rather than merely what to think, in school.

Barring that happening, it is incumbent upon each of us to bone up on these rational, intellectual skills so that we can tell fact from fiction – to make this world a better place for ourselves, and for those who will inherit it when we are gone.

I hope the ideas above will help you become a better critical thinker and live the life you deserve.

Do you have any other tips to help improve the quality of our thinking? Tell us in the comment section below.

How to become a stronger version of yourself for true confidence

Welcome once more to the “How to Be a Grownup Podcast Breakdown”! My name is Erik Andress and I am the host of this show. Today, I am humbled and grateful to bring you the words and wisdom of Youtube sensation and spiritual explorer Elliott Hulse! He is a walking testament to what can be possible when you align with your purpose in this universe and grind hard to find the success that you deserve!

Check out this podcast interview with Elliott to learn all his tips, tricks, and techniques that he wants you to know to live a empowered life :

In this podcast, Elliott shares powerful insight on how his past experiences and the adversity he has overcome has given him amazing insight that allows him to bring holistic, vital information to the millions of people that follow his career.

While there were a lot of gems this inspiring entrepreneur dropped, here are the the three most important ways Elliott believes that you can do to dramatically increase the quality of your life :

1 . Understand that purposeful adversity and suffering leads to greatness

Part of the human experience is pain. Don’t let anybody tell you differently. Anything that is worth doing in life will be challenging. Building, maintaining, and sustaining a business is not for the faint of heart. Developing a deep and loving relationship with a significant other that will stand by your side in the good times and the bad is a journey of personal growth for both partners. However, so many of us don’t give ourselves the tools to deal with these burdens or roadblocks before they happen. We allow ourselves to flounder and fail in the face of challenges, because we haven’t practiced being resilient.

You have the chance to change that today. You have the chance in this twenty four hour period, to give yourself the gift of GRIT and MENTAL TOUGHNESS. Whether you choose to lift weights like Elliot or push yourself by reading a book a day like Tai Lopez, developing that internal sense of resilience will help you to deal with the challenges of everyday life much more easily. Get up off your couch and take on the Spartan Race, see how much you can dead-lift, push yourself to jog a little bit further, pick up a book that seems like it might be beyond your scope of understanding and know that you will better your life for it!

“When you participate in purposeful suffering, your happiness level actually rises.” – Joe De Sena

2 . Realize that your past mistakes cannot dictate the quality of your future

Don’t let other people’s perception of you be the excuse that you use to avoid going for your dreams. As Elliott and I spoke about in the interview, he CHOSE to break out of the negative path that he was walking on. Empower yourself to believe that you are capable of this as well. Allow this paragraph to act as your permission slip to let go of the story that you believe was written for you, and to start to pen a new one for yourself.

Give yourself permission to believe that you are not the negative labels that your educators placed upon you. Give yourself permission to believe that friends and family that doubt your dream, just can’t see the heights that you are capable of reaching. GIve yourself permission to believe that any mistakes that you have made in your past, were made by an entirely different person. Those mistakes were made by a person full of uncertainty, doubt, regret, and devoid of purposeful direction. Give yourself permission to believe that greatness and power are there inside you, just waiting for you to unlock the potential that you have always had!

The only way to get out of mediocrity is to keep shooting for excellence. Eric Thomas

3 . Recognize that patience and persistence are the key ingredients to lasting success

In the social media world that we have been born and bred in, it becomes very easy to believe that success came overnight for so many of the flashy and beautiful individuals that you see on the Instagram recommend page. Nothing in life that is worthwhile comes easily. You want to be successful as a business owner or an entrepreneur? Patience and persistence are the answer. Stop reading books, stop watching Gary Vaynerchuk videos and start to put the work in while understanding that it will be a long trek towards lasting success. Do you want to have a meaningful and deep relationship with a partner that makes your life better? You need to get out there, put yourself in positions where you could meet that person, and bring your best self to every interaction that you have with them. When things get tough, when you argue or fight, push yourself to see the long term as opposed to the conflict in the moment.

There is no debate, success is persistence and patience. Challenges are an inevitable part of your journey towards the top. You will fail. You will stumble. Onlookers might mock you or try to tear down your dreams. You will fall down and get bloodied, bruised, and broken. However, those that make their lasting mark on this world are the ones that choose to say that, “My obstacles don’t define me, my goals do.”

“You are not patient enough. Your lack of patience is killing you.” – Gary Vaynerchuk

Self-development and growth is not a luxury, it’s a necessity for success. It actually benefits your entire life. There is no magic pill or single formula to create the absolute best “YOU” possible.

There is no switch you can press to instantly become a different person. No one can do it for you. If you want to do your personal growth then only you have to do the heavy lifting.

There are some good habits, techniques, and attitudes that you can put in practice to be more like the person you want to be. Of course, to be the best version of yourself is not necessarily easy. It takes time and continuous efforts. It is an ongoing process.

Everyone is born with the capability to be a better version of them. Once a person accepts that he/she has the power to change herself/himself, he/she is ready to start creating a successful and amazing themselves.

Each of the following personal growth tips can be used to relate to your life. These tips help you in knowing who you are as a person and the type of self-improvement you seek.

1) Failure is not the end of the world.

  • If you constantly think that what other people will think about me when I get fail then stop yourself immediately. Failure is the natural process and it is not the signal of the world ending. Realize this truth.
  • Extremely successful people like Bill Gates, Mark Zuckerberg, and Michael Jordan have all failed at some point in their life.
  • Failure always helps us to learn valuable insights which can drive positivity to become highly successful in life. So, don’t let the fear of failure hold you back.

2) Live to please yourself rather than others.

  • Always live in the present moment and celebrate your small wins. Prioritize yourself.
  • Live your life fullest to please yourself rather than others. Your people-pleaser role will lead you to depression, stress, and health issues.
  • So quit pleasing people. It will help you in regaining your self-confidence.

3) Surround yourself with positivity.

  • Positivity plays an important role in self-improvement. So always surround yourself with positive self-talk.
  • We all do self-talk. It is a normal process but when it includes negativity in it, it creates a problem.
  • Eliminate some negative vocabulary from your life dictionary such as but, can’t, try, should, and won’t.

4) Learn to trust yourself and take risks.

  • Have trust in your abilities. Sometimes it’s good to take risks such as if you have fear of facing interviews then go for it, face it.
  • Take a class, learn a new skill, and do whatever that is holding you back.
  • Take a risk and have faith in yourself. Positivity is all that can open doors of success for you.

5) Learn something creative every day.

  • When it is the last time you did something creative or something that you actually love to do? Do it. It will create a positive impact on your life.
  • Also, try to learn something that can help you in becoming a better version of yourself and would have an optimistic effect on your work, life, or study

6) Understand the importance of positive association of great people.

  • Always surround yourself with positive great people. They will help you in all ways to bring out your best.
  • It is one of the most important steps that you can take for your personal growth and improvement.
  • Commit yourself to surround with only amazing people that help you in a constructive way.

7) Say “yes” to life!

  • When life gives you an amazing opportunity, go for it. Don’t wait for other people to say “yes” to life with you. Start living your own.
  • Sometimes you feel like quitting while working on your dream. But, remind yourself of all the great things that you already have and all the great things that are coming into your life.
  • Keep that excitement level high about your work and life. Always be thankful for the amazing life that you have.

8) Fall in love with yourself.

  • Love yourself just as you are. This self-love will only support your procedure of becoming the best version of yourself.
  • Always remember no one in the world is perfect and will never be. So, take a deep breath and say “I love myself” and see how that feels.
  • We can never do our personal growth if we constantly put ourselves down. So, be thankful, learn to forgive, and love yourself. It doesn’t make you selfish.

It makes you indestructible.

9) Keep in mind that strength grows out of weakness.

  • For many people, smoking is a weakness and their comfort. If you are one of them then quit smoking.
  • Smoking is costly and bad for your health. But, if you have an addiction to it you can switch to alternatives like vaping. It is considerably less harmful than smoking and effectual way to kick the smoking addiction.
  • Quitting smoking is a transformational procedure that will change your confidence in yourself, your health and your life.
  • If you work on quitting your weakness then ultimately you are opening new ways for your self-improvement and personal growth.

10) Dress for attention and confidence.

  • Wearing the right attire elevates your self-confidence and helps you in gaining the attention of others.
  • Confidence is the key to success and it helps you in putting your best foot forward.
  • If appropriate dressing can build your confidence level and lead you to success, then what you are waiting for! Go for it.

You can everyday read about how to be a better version of self, but it’s no alternative for actually doing the work. If you want to be a better person in some way, don’t waste your time. Start it right away!

How to become a stronger version of yourself for true confidence

Your private inner dialogue can either be a powerful stepping stone or a major obstacle to reaching your goals. If you constantly make negative predictions like, “I’m going to mess up,” or you call yourself names, your self-talk will rob you of mental strength.

Your thoughts affect how you feel and how you behave. The way you think has the power to become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Thinking, “I’ll never get this job,” may cause you to feel discouraged as you walk into an interview. Consequently, you may slump your shoulders, stare at the floor, and make a poor first impression–and inadvertently sabotage your chances of success.

If you have a harsh inner critic, you’re not alone. Self-doubt, catastrophic predictions, and harsh words are common. But, you don’t have to be a victim of your own verbal abuse.

Although there are many exercises that we use in therapy to help people change the way they think, here are seven ways to tame your inner critic:

1. Pay attention to your thoughts.

You’re so used to hearing your own narration that it’s easy to become oblivious to the messages you’re giving yourself. Start paying close attention to your thoughts and you may discover that you call yourself names or talk yourself out of doing things that are hard.

It’s estimated that you have around 60,000 thoughts per day. That’s 60,000 chances to either build yourself up or tear yourself down. Learning to recognize your thought patterns is key to understanding how your thinking affects your life.

2. Change the channel.

While problem-solving is helpful, ruminating is destructive. When you keep replaying a mistake you made in your head over and over again or you can’t stop thinking about something bad that happened, you’ll drag yourself down.

The best way to change the channel is by getting active. Find an activity that will temporarily distract you from the negative tapes playing in your head.

Go for a walk, call a friend to talk about a different subject, or tackle a project you’ve been putting off. But refuse to listen to your brain beat you up.

3. Examine the evidence.

Your thoughts aren’t always true. In fact, they’re often exaggeratedly negative. It’s important to examine the evidence before you believe your thoughts.

If you think, “I’m going to embarrass myself when I give that presentation,” pause for a minute. Take out a piece of paper and write down all the evidence that indicates you’re going to fail. Then, list all the evidence that you aren’t going to fail.

Looking at the evidence on both sides can help you look at the situation a little more rationally and less emotionally. Reminding yourself that your thoughts aren’t 100 percent true can give you a boost in confidence.

4. Replace exaggeratedly negative thoughts with realistic statements.

When you recognize that your negative thoughts aren’t completely true, try replacing your statements with something more realistic. If you think, “I’ll never get a promotion,” a good replacement statement might be, “If I work hard and I keep investing in myself, I may get promoted someday.”

Keep in mind that you don’t need to develop unrealistically positive statements. Overconfidence can be almost as damaging as serious self-doubt. But a balanced, realistic outlook is key to becoming mentally stronger.

5. Consider how bad it would be if your thoughts were true.

It’s tempting to envision a misstep turning into an utter catastrophe. But, often the worst case scenario isn’t as bad as we fear.

If you predict you’re going to get rejected for a job, ask yourself how bad would that actually be? Rejection stings but it’s not the end of the world.

Reminding yourself that you can handle tough times increases your confidence. It will also decrease much of the dread and worrisome thoughts that can stand in your way.

6. Ask yourself what advice you’d give to a friend.

It’s easier to be compassionate toward other people, rather than yourself. While you might call yourself an idiot for making a mistake, it’s unlikely you’d say that to a loved one.

When you’re struggling with tough times or you’re doubting your ability to succeed, ask yourself, “What would I say to a friend who had this problem?” Then, offer yourself those kind, wise words.

7. Balance self-improvement with self-acceptance.

There’s a difference between telling yourself that you’re not good enough and reminding yourself that there’s room for improvement. Accept your flaws for what they are right now while committing to doing better in the future. Although it sounds a bit counterintuitive, you can do both simultaneously.

You might accept that you feel anxious about an upcoming presentation at work while also making a decision to improve your public speaking skills. Accept yourself for who you are right now while investing into becoming an even better version of yourself down the road.

Train Your Brain to Think Differently

Your mind can be your best asset or worst enemy. It’s important to train it well.

The good news is, mental strength exercises will help you silence the toxic self-criticism for good. With practice, you can develop a more productive inner dialogue that will fuel your efforts to reach your goals.

Last Updated on 1st October 2019

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To become a stronger version of yourself, you need to know these truths. You have to face the challenges which make your life difficult. You should love yourself and you will become a stronger and better person. No doubt life is full of challenges, but when you accept them, you will find a person you never meet before and that will be your strongest version.

1. Accept your own personality:

The first and foremost important thing is that you should accept yourself, self-love is the most important thing. Don’t speak negatively about yourself just because you aren’t perfect. When you start to accept your own personality you will become more happy and successful.
“Perfection is a myth”

2. Face the major challenges:

How difficult it will be? What if I fail? OK, enough… It’s time to accept the challenges. Face it. Stop overthinking. The Overthinking will kill your courage, creativity or consistency. Failure is also a part of life. Be unique, creative and try to face everything bravely. If you fail don’t think that you can’t do anything because failure is also a part of life. When you start to accept the challenges of life you, your personality will become stronger.

3. Take risks and move on:

When you start something new like business, relationship, or maybe a family risk is always there. Try to have faith, take that risk and just move on. A wise man said:

“No risk, no business”

Try to move on at least a bit every day. Admit your mistakes, take some risks, learn the lesson. Don’t stop if you fall again and again, never give up stand up and face the challenge again. You will become more successful when you learn how to move on.

4. You can’t change your past:

When you think about your past you just want to change your past but cannot change it. You are not defined by your mistakes. In fact, it gives you a new path to become a successful person.

Try to live in your present and avoid all the mistakes, you have done before. If you stay in your past you will ruin your present as well. So you should forget about your past mistakes and focus on your future because you can’t change your past.

5. Try to stay positive:

Negativity makes you weaker. Sometimes we are in that season of our life in which we face many negative people, we should try to ignore that negativity. Positive change in your personality makes you stronger. Accept your success and failure in a positive way. Try to surround those people who are positive because negativity always throw you in failure.

6. You are individuals and not a copy:

Comparing yourself to others is destructive. Don’t compare yourself with others other if you do so, you are insulting yourself. There is no comparison between the sun and the moon. They shine when it’s their time. Compare yourself to who you were yesterday. Not to who someone else is today. A King Rahman said:
“Don’t compare yourself with others, no one can play your role better than you’’.

7. You have no control over your destiny:

“Destiny is ours to create. It is a living masterpiece designed by the heart’’.

In order to make a choice that may change your destiny, you must know yourself and what you are creating moment by moment what you do in a present moment bring you closer to being in command of your destiny.

Maybe your past experiences are not good, but your future is about to come you have to prepare for your future. With only one decision you are making a choice of your destiny.

8. Forgive others:

One should understand the flow of life. People come and go. Sometimes they hurt you, they try to insult you, they question your personality, but what other people think is not our concern. They are here to teach us how to accept reality. If we take it seriously, we can’t achieve the goals of our life. They are bitter but the harsh truth of our life. Forgive others, make your heart pure and live your life the way you want to.
“Anger makes you smaller, while forces you to grow”
-Charles-Scott

9. Get rid of what is unnecessary:

Clear the clutter! Live lean with only that which you need around you. The feeling of freedom you gain will liberate you to closer to want what really want. Remove all the unnecessary things from your mind because it will mislead you from your focus and goals. So, stay with those which is necessary for success in your life.
Thomas A Edison said:
“If we did all the things we are capable of doing, we would literally astound ourselves’’.

10. You must give back in the same way:

You must give back in the same way: when you treated badly and get angry don’t hide your emotions and be brave to give back in the same way because when you hide your emotions actually you are hiding your stronger version. Always behave in a good manner isn’t a good response because when you don’t take action you will never be brave.

If you want to live a successful life you must be negative when you need to be. Because if you are too sweet people will easily use you for their own intentions and then leave you. So you must have a strength to give back in the same way.

Final Thoughts

When you start to transform yourself as a stronger personality you will become more successful. You will come to know how to deal with the problems and people in a proper way.

You start to become an example for everyone and people will start to notice your appearance because now you will come in front of them as a strong person who have strong opinions as well, who don’t have achieve anybody’s opinion, who is more passionate about his own life and goals.

How to Become a Better Version of Yourself

As you go through life, you will spend much of your time questioning who you are and how you can make an impact on the world. Although you have the power to reinvent yourself, lots of people spend this time asking what they can do rather than just doing it. However, starting yourself on the path to a better you can be a tricky task, as there will be doubts in your head over whether you can do it. Luckily, there are many tips and tricks out there which can help you reach where you want to be, and which are easy to incorporate into your daily routine.

Identify your goals

Many people have goals in their life to work towards, whether that be dreams to become successful or to build a strong network of friends to share memories with. In any case, it can sometimes take a long time to figure out what you truly want in life. Taking the time to sit down and write about what you love can help you identify these goals and give you something to work towards. Having these goals by your side will help you through days where you aren’t sure where your life is going, as they will give you meaning to your everyday.

Take up a new hobby

It could be that you have lots of free time on your hands that you aren’t putting to good use; while it’s important to have rest days and recuperate from work, this time can also be used to do something new. Many people elect to choose a new hobby that they can use to change their life or the lives of other people. This can be anywhere from learning a new language to unleashing your inner creativity. In any case, you can speed up this process and kickstart your journey into learning by making use of the Raikov Effect, which uses hypnotism to help you learn quicker.

Don’t live your life for other people

Unfortunately, many people live their life according to what other people want them to do. This can lead to identity crises as well as leading a life that fulfills other people, rather than yourself. While it is always good to help other people, you should put your own aspirations first, over those of your parents, friends, or employers. If you aren’t hurting anyone, and you are doing what you love, you will feel more confident that you are living your life to its fullest.

Don’t be afraid to fail

Often, it is the fear of failure which stops people from becoming better versions of themselves. In fact, it can be the only thing holding people back from doing what they love. It is important to remember that failure is a common feature of life and that you can’t progress and learn from your mistakes without it. Learning to embrace failure and turn it into a positive experience will help you become stronger and wise as time goes on.

Do you want to feel truly great about yourself? Would you like to feel at ease wherever you are? If so, read on — this powerful article is meant for you.

First, let’s talk about self-esteem. It’s important to know what self-esteem is so that you can nurture it consciously. Sometimes we use the terms self-esteem and self-confidence interchangeably, yet they are very different qualities.

Let’s take a close look at what it means to be self-confident. Self-confidence generally arises from one’s abilities or characteristics in a certain area and is often dependent on something external or fleeting in nature, such as looks, achievements, or certain skills. As such, self-confidence often diminishes if a characteristic or skill declines. In essence, self-confidence is often dependent on something that is impermanent. It’s important to note that a person can be self-confident in a certain area and actually have low self-esteem.

For example, a person might be confident about their physical appearance or business abilities but have very poor self-esteem. That’s why the successful man driving the fancy car and the “it’s all about me” woman often have low self-esteem. Those who appear “super self-confident” sometimes wear a mask of superiority in an attempt to hide a deep inner sense of inferiority — and they don’t want anyone (even themselves) to know about it! Self-confidence can be rather tricky this way!

Good self-esteem is an incredible quality that is self-earned. Self-esteem is not superficial, nor does it rely on power, looks, external success, or money. Self-esteem is generally permanent and is built by learning and growing from life’s experiences. Interestingly, self-esteem is often strengthened as a result of facing and moving through life’s challenges with an aware, intentional attitude.

In general, you can build a stronger sense of self-esteem by consciously striving to be compassionate, kind, and respectful to yourself and others. In this way, you slowly craft strong self-esteem as the result of striving to be the best version of yourself. Self-esteem takes time and energy to build, yet it is a far more pervasive, lasting quality than self-confidence.

You now have a solid understanding of what makes up self-esteem and why you might want to generate more of this powerful quality. The five steps below will guide you into creating a strong, increasingly permanent sense of self-esteem.

  1. Get to Know and Cultivate Your Self-Esteem: Take an honest, non-judgmental look at your level of self-esteem. If it feels right, you can even rate your self-esteem on a scale of “0-10” so that you have a sense of where you’re starting from. If your self-esteem is lower than you’d like it to be, strive to be kind and compassionate with yourself — it’s never helpful to be judgmental or critical! Instead, just do an honest assessment of where you are now so that you have an idea of where you’d like to be.
  2. Strive for Non-Judgmental Self-Awareness: It’s important to notice both your strengths and weakness in life. First, make a simple list of your greatest strengths. Then, make a simple list of your weak areas. By homing in on your strengths and capacities, you can reinforce these qualities in life. For example, you might be truly appreciative of your ability to be grounded or your capacity to focus. In the same way, nonjudgmentally notice the areas where you feel frail or weak — these are the places that can be honored, healed, and strengthened when possible. As easy examples, you might notice that your boundaries aren’t as strong as you’d like or that you tend to be highly critical. As you develop your two lists, strive to be compassionate and non-judgmental. Your goal is simply to assess the areas where you feel strong and the areas where you feel rather weak or challenged.
  3. Do Your Self-Work with TLC: You now have two important lists. One contains qualities that you like and may want to strengthen or increase. The other list reflects your weaknesses, the areas that you want to heal, strengthen, or shift in some way. Place your lists in a place you can see them every day — whether on your fridge, desktop, or cell phone. Each day, pick at least two of your positive qualities to focus on with loving awareness. Give gratitude for these qualities and smile in appreciation for the work you’ve done (and continue to do) to foster them. Then, select one item on your list of weak areas to work on just a bit each day. For example, you may choose to work on setting boundaries at work one day and being less judgmental the next day. Take a playful, can-do approach, and you’ll begin to see (and feel) results week by week.
  4. Embrace Learning: Strive to embrace an attitude of self-compassion that is oriented toward learning and growing. Consciously move toward respectful tolerance with yourself and others as you move away from judgment, criticism, and resentment. When you cultivate an attitude of curiosity and self-awareness, your focus shifts away from the dualistic attitude of “right or wrong” and into the realm of thinking and doing whatever feels most productive. This shift in attitude will create more positivity in your life. As you become more self-aware and intentional, your self-esteem will steadily grow.
  5. Be Patient as You Strive for Self-Love: By working on yourself with honesty, positivity, acceptance, and kindness, you will come to appreciate yourself more and more. Be patient with yourself, for change does not happen overnight. As you learn to accept that you are a “work in process,” your self-love will grow. This type of self-love is true and not dependent on looks, how much money you have, or the brand of car you drive.

As you follow the above steps with conscious attention, you’ll begin to notice a true difference in yourself and your life. You won’t be trying to impress anyone or prove yourself. Instead, you’ll be focusing your energy on being the kind of person you want — you desire — to be. You’ll know and radiate the power of strong, hard-earned self-esteem. And, perhaps for the first time in your life, you’ll find that you’re truly loving yourself from the inside out.

Embrace and enjoy insights like the above — and so much more — in the pages of my powerful new book, Joy from Fear.

Do you want to feel truly great about yourself? Would you like to feel at ease wherever you are? If so, read on — this powerful article is meant for you.

First, let’s talk about self-esteem. It’s important to know what self-esteem is so that you can nurture it consciously. Sometimes we use the terms self-esteem and self-confidence interchangeably, yet they are very different qualities.

Let’s take a close look at what it means to be self-confident. Self-confidence generally arises from one’s abilities or characteristics in a certain area and is often dependent on something external or fleeting in nature, such as looks, achievements, or certain skills. As such, self-confidence often diminishes if a characteristic or skill declines. In essence, self-confidence is often dependent on something that is impermanent. It’s important to note that a person can be self-confident in a certain area and actually have low self-esteem.

For example, a person might be confident about their physical appearance or business abilities but have very poor self-esteem. That’s why the successful man driving the fancy car and the “it’s all about me” woman often have low self-esteem. Those who appear “super self-confident” sometimes wear a mask of superiority in an attempt to hide a deep inner sense of inferiority — and they don’t want anyone (even themselves) to know about it! Self-confidence can be rather tricky this way!

Good self-esteem is an incredible quality that is self-earned. Self-esteem is not superficial, nor does it rely on power, looks, external success, or money. Self-esteem is generally permanent and is built by learning and growing from life’s experiences. Interestingly, self-esteem is often strengthened as a result of facing and moving through life’s challenges with an aware, intentional attitude.

In general, you can build a stronger sense of self-esteem by consciously striving to be compassionate, kind, and respectful to yourself and others. In this way, you slowly craft strong self-esteem as the result of striving to be the best version of yourself. Self-esteem takes time and energy to build, yet it is a far more pervasive, lasting quality than self-confidence.

You now have a solid understanding of what makes up self-esteem and why you might want to generate more of this powerful quality. The five steps below will guide you into creating a strong, increasingly permanent sense of self-esteem.

  1. Get to Know and Cultivate Your Self-Esteem: Take an honest, non-judgmental look at your level of self-esteem. If it feels right, you can even rate your self-esteem on a scale of “0-10” so that you have a sense of where you’re starting from. If your self-esteem is lower than you’d like it to be, strive to be kind and compassionate with yourself — it’s never helpful to be judgmental or critical! Instead, just do an honest assessment of where you are now so that you have an idea of where you’d like to be.
  2. Strive for Non-Judgmental Self-Awareness: It’s important to notice both your strengths and weakness in life. First, make a simple list of your greatest strengths. Then, make a simple list of your weak areas. By homing in on your strengths and capacities, you can reinforce these qualities in life. For example, you might be truly appreciative of your ability to be grounded or your capacity to focus. In the same way, nonjudgmentally notice the areas where you feel frail or weak — these are the places that can be honored, healed, and strengthened when possible. As easy examples, you might notice that your boundaries aren’t as strong as you’d like or that you tend to be highly critical. As you develop your two lists, strive to be compassionate and non-judgmental. Your goal is simply to assess the areas where you feel strong and the areas where you feel rather weak or challenged.
  3. Do Your Self-Work with TLC: You now have two important lists. One contains qualities that you like and may want to strengthen or increase. The other list reflects your weaknesses, the areas that you want to heal, strengthen, or shift in some way. Place your lists in a place you can see them every day — whether on your fridge, desktop, or cell phone. Each day, pick at least two of your positive qualities to focus on with loving awareness. Give gratitude for these qualities and smile in appreciation for the work you’ve done (and continue to do) to foster them. Then, select one item on your list of weak areas to work on just a bit each day. For example, you may choose to work on setting boundaries at work one day and being less judgmental the next day. Take a playful, can-do approach, and you’ll begin to see (and feel) results week by week.
  4. Embrace Learning: Strive to embrace an attitude of self-compassion that is oriented toward learning and growing. Consciously move toward respectful tolerance with yourself and others as you move away from judgment, criticism, and resentment. When you cultivate an attitude of curiosity and self-awareness, your focus shifts away from the dualistic attitude of “right or wrong” and into the realm of thinking and doing whatever feels most productive. This shift in attitude will create more positivity in your life. As you become more self-aware and intentional, your self-esteem will steadily grow.
  5. Be Patient as You Strive for Self-Love: By working on yourself with honesty, positivity, acceptance, and kindness, you will come to appreciate yourself more and more. Be patient with yourself, for change does not happen overnight. As you learn to accept that you are a “work in process,” your self-love will grow. This type of self-love is true and not dependent on looks, how much money you have, or the brand of car you drive.

As you follow the above steps with conscious attention, you’ll begin to notice a true difference in yourself and your life. You won’t be trying to impress anyone or prove yourself. Instead, you’ll be focusing your energy on being the kind of person you want — you desire — to be. You’ll know and radiate the power of strong, hard-earned self-esteem. And, perhaps for the first time in your life, you’ll find that you’re truly loving yourself from the inside out.

Embrace and enjoy insights like the above — and so much more — in the pages of my powerful new book, Joy from Fear.

You owe it to yourself to not remain at the same level you were yesterday.

Everyday you have life, you should work at becoming the best version of yourself. It takes determination and a willingness to achieve. It is also a gradual process, so don’t expect change to happen at the flick of the wrist.

Growth should be continuous and consistent.

The question is how to do we begin? how do we constantly improve ourselves? how do we become a better version of ourselves?

Here are 10 tips on how to become a better version of yourself.

#1. Put yourself in a better position for improvement

Putting yourself in a better position comes in different forms.

For one, you should not be be afraid to take on new opportunities. Sometimes the only thing holding you back is the fear of the unknown. Off course not everyone is going to be a CEO of a company, but in whatever capacity you find yourself, there is need to constantly improve.

Do not shy away from opportunities.

A farmer needs to upgrade to higher level of farming equipment to be able to compete in the bigger market.

A tech worker needs to constantly learn and improve his skills, because the industry is fast changing.

If you refuse to learn, unlearn and re-learn, you would not make any progress in life. Most books have a revised edition, to be able to keep up with changing times.

#2. Adopt positive habits.

Developing just a single positive habit can work like a chain reaction.

When you stop a bad habit, you need to replace it immediately with something better. For example, developing the habit of making a to-do list sets the tone for a more organised day.

I would like to add that one great habit to cultivate is Reading. Read a book often.

Books provide you with knowledge and opens your mind to different perspectives on things. Its best to read books from different niches, that way you do not limit yourself. Reading a book will change what you know.

#3. Take on new challenges

Expose yourself to new things. You can take on the challenge to learn a new language.

No matter how little they may seem, the more you say yes to opportunities, the better you become.

Irrespective of how inadequate you may feel, take it. A little bit of Nervousness mixed with excitement is a good place start. Don’t let imposter syndrome get the better of you.

#4. Learn a new skill

Learning a new skill increases confidence. Asides confidence, Learning something new has a positive effect on the brain. There is no age at which you should cease to learn.

Its best to choose a skill that will be useful to you, i.e. Find meaning in the skill you are learning and create avenues to use it.

#5. Practice Journalling

I am advocate of writing down your thoughts. I gives you more time to reflect. One way to use Journalling to improve yourself is to practice the act of writing down all the things you are grateful for.

Gratitude Journalling is one proactive way to make yourself happy.

You should realize that no one on earth is responsible for your happiness. The responsibility for your happiness lies in your own hands. Take proactive steps to remain happy.

Gratitude Journalling also helps you focus on the positive areas of your life. It is said to reduce stress and also build emotional resilience.

#6. Take proper care of your health

At the end of the day, you can only be useful to yourself and others around you, when you are alive and healthy.

Take good care of your body. Eat healthy, rest and sleep.

I hear this story of how great men did not get to where they were by sleeping, true, there may be times when we have to sacrifice some sleep to be able to achieve some certain things but let it not be a constant. Our bodies were made to rest.

Adequate sleep is beneficial for the body to function properly.

#7 Cultivate and Sustain Relationships

Humans thrive within social constructs.

We do not do well alone, we may think we can but we need respectful relationships. Encourage, make quality time for others and show understanding to others.

#8 Identify your shortcomings

No one is perfect, Identify your flaws and work at being better. Take responsibility of your negative actions.

#9 Avoid Negativity

Stay away from every form of Negativity. Having negative people surrounding you will not allow you to grow and its also very bad for your mental Health.

# 10 Set goals

Set goals daily, monthly and yearly with steps on how you would be able to reach those goals and work towards achieving them.

You achieve that which you have conceived and manifested.

But I am like an Olive tree, thriving in the House of God. Psalm 52 v 8a