How to build a social circle a two step formula

How to build a social circle a two step formula

Would you like to surround yourself with beautiful women and good, solid friends?

If you’re like most guys, the answer is “Yes” — though the sad truth is, most guys don’t really know how to make this happen.

For many men, meeting friends can feel “awkward” or forced, and as a result, a lot of guys end up as loners. However, it doesn’t have to be that way.

Hi, I’m David Dupree, and today I’m answering one of the most difficult, burning questions guys have when it comes to sex & dating.

This week, I’m answering this question a reader brought me:

How to build a social circle a two step formula

“How can I build a social circle and start meeting more women?”

How to build a social circle a two step formula

In this video, I reveal how to build a social circle, plus:

  • Why you should always bring THIS kind of friend to parties…
  • The bizarre reason why your female friends are your “secret weapon”…
  • A step-by-step method to build a solid social circle and start meeting more women…
  • Why you should always go out when invited to this kind of event (filled with gorgeous women)…
  • How to show off your fun & confident side, no matter how you’re feeling…

How to build a social circle a two step formula

How to Get a Social Circle Full of Women Who Want YOU…

One of my students recently went from having ZERO friends… to having a swarm of attractive women chase after him to “hang out”… and there’s one big reason why:

Talking to a new woman can feel a lot like shooting in the dark… you can say & do everything right… but if she’s “not feeling it”… or if she has a boyfriend? Forget it.

So as you may have guessed, when I showed my student an easy way to tell if a girl is into him… without having to talk to her or play any “games”… he started getting a lot more action, a lot faster.

It reveals if the woman you want — whether she’s “just a friend,” an acquaintance, or even a complete stranger — likes you the same way you like her:

How to build a social circle a two step formulaThis is a guest post. If interested in submitting a guest post please read our guest posting policy then contact us.

As a man, you know that your friends can play a huge part of how great your life is, or is not. That is why it’s critical that you understand and practice the skill of making friends, and building your social circle.

In this article, I want to share with you my 2-Step Formula for building your social circle. If you use it, you’ll start to have more and more great friends in your life, without having to “work” at it. We all know how our lifestyles depend on what kind of friends we have.

If you don’t have enough friends, or think you deserve better ones, and you are ready to get a social life that is filled with opportunities for mutual help and fun experiences, then I think you’ll enjoy using this formula…

Step #1 – Meet New Friends

Here is the deal, no matter how many friends you have right now, you’ll have less friends in the future. This is the case because many people just move away; get into new interests, into new relationships, change jobs, and then fade away from your daily life.

Without knowing it, you get to have less and less friends as time goes by. This is why you need the habit of making more and more friends, and constantly.

The best way to do this is to subscribe to a club, or community, with people who share one of your interests or hobbies. They have to have cool people in there, and they have to be meeting regularly . You can find them in websites like meetup.com, internations.org, or topic-based online forums.

What you do is go to every event they organize, and meet people on the basis that you already have something in common with them. If you want to speed this up, try and take a role in the organizing team. This will make people see you as one of the guys in charge of the whole thing, and make it very easy for you to get to know everyone.

Step #2 – Introduce Them to Other Friends, or to Each Other

Most people don’t realize how important it is to introduce your friends to each other. Once you start to deliberately connect the people you know, you’ll see how easier it gets to keep your social life going.

Once a week, as you plan what social activities you’re going to do, deliberately include some new people, you haven’t gone out with before. Because you’re going to “plug them” with the other people you have in your life, they have a much bigger chance of sticking around.

As a bonus, you won’t be the only one arranging all the plans, and making all the calls. The friends in your group will do it as well. But, if you only focus on individual friends, you’ll be the one doing all the work.

People love to hang out with more than one person at a time, especially for the weekend. This is why it’s so much easier to add friends in your life, if you’re going to introduce them to others at the same time.

More Tips And Techniques…

I would love to share with you more techniques for overcoming hesitation and meeting new people through my Free Social Skills Newsletter.

In it, I will show you the best techniques and strategies for meeting and making friends. I’ll also share with you new tips for having amazing conversations, that instantly make people want to get to know you.

Good luck,
– Paul Sanders

Paul Sanders teaches you how to: Overcome Shyness & Loneliness; Master Conversation & Social Skills; Make Friends & Build a Social Circle. Start here Free Social Skills Newsletter

Make the most of your social circle

How to build a social circle a two step formula

Robert Daly / Getty Images

Research shows that healthy and supportive relationships can reduce stress and improve your overall health and sense of well-being.   Building a network of supportive friends, or even just one supportive relationship, can be vital to your mental health.

Here are some key skills that can help you to build relationships with people that are truly supportive and sustaining.

Meet New People

It takes some work, but cultivating a circle of truly supportive friendships can make a huge difference in how you handle stress and life. The more people you have in your life, the more likely you are to have truly supportive relationships with at least one of them. It’s beneficial to be able to regularly add new people to your circle.

Make the Time

Carving out the time to maintain—and expand—your social circle can be difficult. But even if your schedule is already filled to the brim with other responsibilities, you can always find moments to socialize. The key is learning how to organize and manage your time.

Effective time management techniques can also help you remember to check in regularly with your friends, something that will help strengthen your bond with them.

Be Assertive

People often think of assertiveness as “standing up for yourself” and “not letting people push you around”—basically the alternative to passivity. While this is mostly true, assertiveness is also the alternative to aggressiveness. The difference is that with assertiveness, you don’t have to get your needs met at the expense of others’ needs.

Developing the skill of assertiveness can really help you strengthen your relationships, making them mutually supportive, lasting, and opening the lines of communication.

Listen

When you’ve had a hard day, sometimes being able to vent to a trusted friend is all it takes to turn things around. Feeling heard and truly understood can have profound effects on us.

Don’t forget that your friends need that same support. Here are some things to remember when friends are talking about things that stress or upset them:

  • Ask them about their feelings, and listen.
  • Reflect back what you hear, so they know you really understand.
  • Instead of always trying to tie the conversation back to your experiences, focus questions on them and their feelings.
  • Pay attention without thinking about what you’re going to say next.

Trust Your Intuition

When you’re around certain people, pay attention to how you feel. If you feel warm or at ease with the person, your intuition is probably giving you the green light that this person is okay.

However, if you leave your encounter with someone feeling anxious, drained, or like something is wrong but you can’t explain what, your intuition may be telling you that person is a no-go for you.

If you pay attention to and act on the signals that your intuition sends you, you’ll have a healthier social circle and stronger relationships. Here are some questions to ask yourself:

  • Does the conversation flow easily, or is it forced?
  • Do you feel they truly understand, accept, and support you?
  • Do you feel you truly understand, accept, and support them?
  • Do you feel better or worse about yourself when you’re with them?
  • Do you leave them feeling energized or down?
  • Do you include them in your life for positive qualities they have, or just to have more people in your life?

Let Go

Not everyone is an appropriate match. If there is someone you just don’t seem to mesh well with, it’s okay to put that relationship on the back burner or let it fade away. Even if you have years of history with this person, sometimes people just grow apart—and that’s okay. That doesn’t mean there’s something ‘wrong’ with either of you.

But if someone in your life makes you feel bad about yourself, it’s maybe time to let them go. If you want to keep them in your life in a peripheral way, that’s okay, too. However, it would be beneficial to remember not to count on them for support.

Only you know if the relationship is worth keeping or not. But it is important to have several people you can count on for support in your life.

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Do you feel like you lack friends in your life?

Do you ever feel lonely?

Or would you simply like to freshen up and increase your social circles a little bit?

In this course, Norway’s most high profile social and communications coach TJ Guttormsen shares the strategies and techniques used by thousands of people across the world to transform their social lives.

TJ’s expertise on social skills and personal networking is highly sought after, and he’s done well over 100 national media appearances in his home country discussing the topic.

Now living in Las Vegas, TJ is taking his work internationally yet again, and for the first time sharing these strategies – usually reserved for workshops and coaching valued in the thousands of dollars – in an affordable online program available for anyone.

“In short, if someone asks me how to be a good friend, I’ll just show them this course. It has all you need to know about how to make new friends, how to be a good friend and how you can benefit of it. And even more. In details. This course is very well structured, it leads you step-by-step from basic info and principles to real-life practical guides and strategies that you can start using immediately.” – ALEXANDER SHEVTSOV, UDEMY STUDENT

“Simple and efficient. Perfectly realistic advice! So I would say. dare to apply this training and get what you want! Already working for me!” – ALBERT FERNANDEZ, UDEMY STUDENT

The problem.

More adults are lonely or dissatisfied with their social life than ever before. Studies have shown that at least 20% of Americans feel lonely on a daily basis, and as many as 12% have said that they have no one to talk to.

And these numbers are not any lower in the rest of the world.

Even many of the ones who aren’t lonely are still not happy. They feel like they lack opportunities to socialize in the way they want, with the kind of people they want. They have become trapped in routines that keep them from fully enjoying life with other people.

As adults, we tend to have less exposure to new potential friends than we did as children. We used to almost continuously meet new kids through school, hobbies, sports, or just on the neighborhood’s playgrounds. And the simple act of being in the same place repeatedly tended to create bonds and friendships for many.

In adulthood, most of us have lost those arenas. And even when we do spend time in public with other adults, we hardly ever interact with them in any meaningful way that might lead to more than – at best – a superficial conversation.

Time and energy tend to be in shorter supply too, and many are simply unsure of how to approach someone new, and how to follow up on people we like to create a friendship with them.

We have become a population of adults who spend time around each other – but not with each other.

The solutions.

In this course, TJ gives you the solutions to all these challenges and more.

TJ’s teaching style is clear and straight to the point, with no fluff, abstract concepts, or guessing games. In the first section alone, you’ll learn simple and easily understandable techniques and tactics that will help you:

– Easily and comfortably start conversations with new people.

– Create conversations that are interesting to you and that attracts the right type of people.

– Go from a superficial first conversation to something more meaningful.

– Move potential friendships forward easily and naturally.

– Turn acquaintances into friends.

– Multiply your friendships with one simple strategy.

In the second section, TJ shares simple and practical advice on how and where to meet other adults who are likely to also be on the lookout for new friendships themselves. You’ll, among other things, learn:

– Where people open to – and even looking for – new social connections can most easily be found.

– How to find the time and energy to socialize and meet new people.

– How to create your own events designed either to increase your social network or attract specific people to it.

– How to receive more invitations from others.

– How to be included by others in ways that almost automatically increases your social circles.

There’s also a section on how to maintain the new friendships that you’re going to be creating.

And to top it off, TJ will show you the most effective and most commonly used strategies that professional networkers use – and how you can apply those strategies to your own social life. In this section, you’ll learn how to build a relationship with basically anyone you’d like – whether they’re already in your network or a complete stranger.

“The fast-paced and logical sequence of simple and doable steps [that] TJ feeds his students in this course really worked for me. I like that the course was very action-oriented, as opposed to reflective. What I need are steps to take action. Not ways to reflect. So that’s another reason I loved this course.” – VANESSA KING, UDEMY STUDENT

“This is an outstanding course presented in an engaging manner. It is full of good advice and ideas for making friends and expanding your social circle.” – JEFFREY D WILSON, UDEMY STUDENT

In other words.

This course will take you step-by-step through the process of finding potential new friends, creating a conversation with them, extending that conversation and creating more time together until a fully formed friendship appears. You’ll learn how to use events – both yours and others’ – to quickly increase and design your social network. How to be included in the activities of others, and how to deepen and maintain your relationships.

This course really is the A – Z of making friends and building better social circles, and it has been used successfully by people of all adult ages, all over the world.

TJ himself has even used these exact strategies to build his social circles in cities like Trondheim and Oslo in Norway, and Los Angeles and Las Vegas in the US.

These strategies work for anyone who learns and uses them, so the only question is if you’re ready for a positive change in your life?

How often have you been bored or lonely because you didn’t have anyone to spend time with?

How many times have you felt like life was passing you by socially?

How much more would you enjoy your life if you were surrounded by people that you had chosen for yourself, who were eager to do the same things as you – together with you?

Sign up now, and let TJ show you how to solve all of these challenges and more.

Co-founder of The Entrepreneurial Mind, serial entrepreneur and professor of entrepreneurship.

Five Steps to Secure Social Capital During a Pandemic

A myth about entrepreneurs is that we are just a bunch of “lone rangers.” (The Lone Ranger was a fictional former Texas Ranger who went off on his own to fight bad guys). According to the lone ranger myth, the reason we start our own businesses is that we can’t get along with others. We can’t function in an organizational structure. So we ride off into the wilderness by ourselves to chase down our next deal.

Every myth is based on a bit of truth. Entrepreneurs do tend to have a higher need for independence. There are decades of studies of entrepreneurs that suggest we have a stronger urge to be independent than the average person. In simple terms, psychologists define the personality trait of independence as preferring to act on one’s own thoughts rather than follow others.

Just because we have the urge to follow our own ideas does not mean we have poor social skills. To the contrary, independent thinking is recognized as an important part of healthy social skills by most psychologists.

In fact, there is a growing body of research suggesting that what is called social capital, having a strong network of people with knowledge, experience, and wisdom to draw from, is an important determinant of entrepreneurial success. It can be even more important for many entrepreneurs as the financial capital they need to succeed in business.

Important Sources of Social Capital

What are the sources of social capital for entrepreneurs?

It starts with their family and friends. At first glance it might seem that the social isolation we are all practicing should facilitate a stronger flow of social capital to entrepreneurs. After all, we are quarantined 24/7 with our family. However, being forced into togetherness is challenging us to find new ways to interact as a family. Those who have retired often talk about the initial challenges of finding a new rhythm for family life once the retiree is so much more time at home. During our adjustment to everyone being at home, it can become difficult if not impossible for family members to provide the social capital the entrepreneur needs from them.

Another critical source of social capital for entrepreneurs are their mentors, coaches, and advisors. These are the people who help keep entrepreneurs moving ahead and staying “between the rails.” At this point in my career, one of my greatest joys is serving as a mentor for countless student and alumni entrepreneurs. I know how important my mentors and advisors were for me when I was a full-time entrepreneur, and hope that I can pay it forward to today’s young entrepreneurs.

Entrepreneurs also receive vital social capital from their peers, that is, from other entrepreneurs. This includes industry peers, which is why we are drawn to meet-up groups, trade shows, and industry associations. These peers help us with the content of our businesses. It also includes entrepreneurs outside of their industry. The social capital we get from these entrepreneurs is more about the journey of entrepreneurship and about the challenges of being an entrepreneur, rather than the more technical aspects of building the business.

Staying Connected with Social Capital

Just as raising financial capital for a business takes time and effort, so too does securing the social capital we need. Here are five steps to ensure that entrepreneurs get the social capital they need to keep their businesses moving ahead during these challenging times:

  1. Intentionality in working from home. There is an old adage in family business: keep family time for family, and work time for work. As we adjust to a work-from-home economy, we need to take this advice to heart. There are many great articles available on how to effectively work from home. I posted one at this site.
  2. Family support needs structure. It is imperative to create a structure that ensures you can tap into the family support you need for your business. I find that our daily neighborhood walks is when I get the advice and support from Mrs. C. that I so desperately need for my work as a professor and as an entrepreneur.
  3. Mentors reach out regularly. Those of us who have the privilege of being mentors to entrepreneurs need to be intentional about reaching out regularly to touch bases. Even a quick text or email can go a long way to ensure the entrepreneurs we work with have a life line to us when they need it. Many of the entrepreneurs I talk with express feeling alone in their struggle to keep their businesses alive. Remind them that they are not alone.
  4. Set up weekly/monthly Zoom coffee or beers. I have various people who I meet with regularly over a cup of coffee or a beer. Some are my mentors, some are peers, and others are those who I mentor. Don’t let these important meetings stop because of the coronavirus. Create a regular schedule of zoom coffees and/or zoom beers to keep these vital conversations alive.
  5. Peer-based Zoom meetings. We have an amazing group of alumni entrepreneurs who all meet once a month to talk about their entrepreneurial journeys. Until we can safely meeting as a group, we are moving ahead, same time as always, on Zoom. Is it as good as meeting face-to-face? No, but it is better than losing this source of social capital.

Even as we seek to stay safe through social isolation, it does not mean that entrepreneurs must become isolated from their critical sources of social capital.

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How to build a social circle a two step formula

Transforming your ideas into reality through collaboration

Empower your ideas with domain knowledge from experts beyond your social circle

Connecting you with like-minded people around the world with similar interests

Exposure to infinite ideas you can never imagine

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Attracting quality people starts with taking responsibility for your actions and how they affect those around you.

How to build a social circle a two step formula

Whether looking to build stronger relationships with the good people you already know or add more high-value friends into your life, attracting quality people starts with taking responsibility for your actions and how they affect those around you and who you attract. Understanding the qualities to cultivate within yourself will lead the right people to naturally gravitate toward you.

It’s a two-way street.

What you are, you attract. If we expect quality people to want to spend time with us, we’ll need to exhibit quality behaviors in return. That means evaluating the way we treat the people in our lives. No one is perfect, but we should focus on cultivating quality behaviors if we expect anyone to treat us in the same way.

Build better interpersonal skills.

Every relationship is only as good as the people in it so you’ll want to work on qualities that help build stronger connections with others. That means developing interpersonal skills like active listening, paying attention, respect, honesty, and acceptance.

Lend a helping hand.

The Dalai Lama once said, “generosity is the most natural outward expression of an inner attitude of compassion and loving-kindness.” Giving to others, whether money, time, or expertise, is a great way of showing others that we care. While you should give without the expectation of something in return, giving will also inspire kindness in others and attract generous people into our lives.

Develop a positive attitude.

Do you find the glass half-full or half-empty? Sure, it’s an old cliche, but developing a positive outlook has many proven benefits that, not only make it easier to get through life but also attract quality people. Our attitude affects those around us. Quality people will naturally avoid negativity. So if you want to attract positive people, make sure you also have a positive perspective.

Smile!

“When you’re smiling, the whole world smiles with you.” Aside from having tons of health benefits like relieving stress, lowering blood pressure, and building a strong immune system, smiling also attracts more people and makes you more likable. Simply smiling brings the opportunity of meeting someone new.

Put yourself out there.

While it may not always seem easy to open up, you can’t meet new, quality people without putting yourself out there. That might mean going out of your comfort zone. Look for events where you could easily meet people who share common interests. If you like to exercise, attend a workout class. If you like art, check out the new exhibition in town. By putting yourself out there, you’ll have the chance to connect with new people.

Quality people lift each other up.

Surround yourself with people who lift you up, support you in your goals, and give you encouragement. Let’s say you have a new business idea or weight loss goal. You’ll want the people around you to say things like “That sounds amazing!” or “How can I help?” At the same time, you’ll want to do the same for those around you as they focus on their new endeavors.

Learning when to let go.

Of course, sometimes even when we develop good behaviors within ourselves, we can let the good in with the bad. It’s important to keep in mind that not everyone is worth our time. Giving time and energy to the wrong people can bring us down. In that case, we should learn when to let go of toxic relationships and walk away.

From a one-man band to a mellifluous duet . The ABC of being social animals.

S omewhere amid the sleepless nights spent changing diapers, dancing like a clown, giving silly background voices to the various woven characters of imaginary and perfectly unreal stories, and mealtime negotiations, a child ‘grows up’. The most significant characteristic of growing up is that a child stops “crying” for attention, for now they “crave” an audience of other toddlers who would be even more attentive to their cute acts. Put in simpler terms, as a child grows up, they become more eager to mimic their parents, and in doing so, they seek a ‘social circle’, with concrete goals of expanding it over time.

This is the A-B-C’s of being a social species. We long for friends, we long for company. We desire social interaction as a child, and that desire multiplies as years get added to our calendar. The habit of being ‘social’, which stems from this desire, later comes in handy when social interaction becomes an almost inevitable part of living in a society. So, what can parents do to aid their child in ‘becoming social’?

How to build a social circle a two step formula

From Planning a Family to Planning a Play-date

A rranging a child’s play (date) is no “child’s play”. But once a parent successfully accomplishes that, they might very well savour the benefits they reap as a result. Going on a playdate gives a child a chance to explore a new location with new stimuli (including a critter just their size and a bucket of new toys), which, in turn, can inspire them to enter the play zone and thereby loosen their grip on their parents.

Play dates can be good preparation for pre-school as well, since it’s always advisable to test the social waters. A child can gradually get their feet wet, rather than just plunging straight into the water. They’ll also experience their first (tough) lessons in how to share and take turns, two essentials for getting along in preschool (and in life). It would also inculcate in them the very basic social etiquettes of greetings and other formalities, like table manners, because children learn more when they observe, and, kids are fond of copying and competing to be better than one another.

How to build a social circle a two step formula

The other essential skills of accepting conflicting perspectives positively, being appreciative of what someone else has to offer, and being both receptive and reciprocative of affection and sympathy get imbued in a child’s personality as they get more and more exposed to their peer group. It also instills the qualities of a being a good team worker as sharing toys & deciding which games to play requires the ability to negotiate and cooperate. To eliminate the possibilities of parallel plays, a child would acquire the skills of problem-solving and conflict resolution. Knowing how to respond to critical situations from a very young age becomes helpful later in their lives when harsh realities hit, hard & fast. These functional skills combined together would allow a child to develop into a well-mannered and respectful adult.

“With Pros Come Probabilities”

P lay dates look nice, right? But it might be a wise idea for parents to have a word with their child before letting them step outside the bounds of the comfortable & “safe” home. Teach a child the minimum standards of “safety” they should keep in view when playing at someone else’s home with fairly unfamiliar people around. One mother might teach her daughter that it’s never appropriate to play in bedrooms when at another person’s home. A father may teach his daughter that she’s never to be alone with a male, whether it’s a big brother or an adult, when playing at a friend’s home. A parent must also ensure that there’s an adult around most of the time to supervise the kids while they play. Different parents can have different sets of criteria as to how they measure their child’s safety outside the home. But being naive/indifferent or at least acting so, just out of the fear of being laughed off as an “overprotective” parent, should absolutely be avoided because your child’s security is both your priority and responsibility.

Freedom from rules and race,

Let me play and come back home with a smile on my face.

Fabulous users, we are so excited to announce the launch of the brand new Fabulous Circle! This journey will show you exactly how to create and grow a supportive team of changemakers. You’ll be shown step-by-step how to build this motivational group of positive people guiding and cheering each other on towards total personal achievement.

How to build a social circle a two step formula

Together you’ll create a circle of like-minded dreamers. You’ll all be working towards your own individual goals while drawing inspiration from each other. You’ll discover how an interactive community of Fabulous users can provide mutual accountability and encouragement every step of the way.

Your journey to creating a Circle of support begins now

  • How to build a social circle a two step formula

This Fabulous Journey isn’t just about your personal development. Through the Circle, you’ll become a sounding board and an inspirational coach to other Fabulous users whilst also benefiting from their advice and support. A circle has no beginning or end and neither will this reciprocal and fabulous exchange of positive encouragement.

As each user shares daily posts about their own journey, you’ll get to know one another and become a cohesive team.

Research from The Journal of Applied Behavioral Science shows that groups with the same objectives achieve more than individuals. Being a member of a positive team all working towards similar goals provides you with the space to ask questions, or brainstorm ways forward when you face challenges. Instead of throwing in the towel when things get hard, circle members will work together to problem solve. When you meet milestones the circle will revel in your achievements. When one of you enjoys success it will be a feather in all your caps! You will all become active members in a positive community of change.

As your circle expands, you’ll learn about group dynamics. You’ll become an expert in motivating your team every day, providing help to more and more people.

When you are tempted, challenged, or frustrated, who will you turn to? Who will remind you of all the progress you’ve already made and help to break down your future goals into achievable and practical steps forward? This six-week Fabulous Circle journey will helps you to create your own social accountability and support system rolled into one. We’ll take you through the steps of setting up a Facebook group, recruiting new members, and developing weekly goals to grow your circle of authentic connections with other Fabulous users.

Every Fabulous circle is different. Each one is strengthened by the unique members of the group. As you get to know each other and share your stories you will begin to bond over a common goal. By following this journey you will become a Fabulous circle founder.

Are you ready to create the ultimate accountability and support network?

To access this journey, go into your Fabulous settings and sync or re-download the content.