How to keep a conversation going and never run out of things to say

You’re talking, conversation is flowing nicely, and you feel like you’re really starting to form a connection with this person…

But what happens when after 10 minutes, that dreaded moment rears its head?

The awkward silence!

What should you do when you feel like a particular conversational topic has expired? And how do you never run out of things to say so you keep people engaged and interested?

Well, let’s take a step back to understand the awkward silence…

Who does the awkward silence seem to occur most with: strangers or friends? Undoubtedly, strangers. But why? You’d think there would be so much more interesting ground to cover with strangers. With friends, you know how they feel about the most important topics. You’re left with just random stuff that pops into your head. Yet you still can find yourselves talking for hours in a stream of unrelated randomness. Without any sort of agenda, conversation just flows.

This is exactly the point. When you feel like you’ve run out of things to say with strangers, you haven’t actually run out of things to say. You’ve simply run out of things that have passed your internal filter of “good enough to say to a stranger!”

This is why you can talk for hours nothing with people you know well. Why you can turn a conversation about “nothing” into something you both really cherish. It’s not just because you have common interests. It is because neither of you has a very high threshold for what is “good enough” to say. If something pops into your head, you blurt it out.

This is also why it is much easier to speak to people when you’ve had a few drinks. It’s not that you’ve suddenly become more clever or interesting (sorry to burst your bubble!) It’s that you’ve lowered your inhibitions. You say what comes to your mind without thinking if it is “good enough” to vocalize.

The key here is that you are not anticipating too far ahead. You need to trust yourself to adapt on the fly. You need to remove the filter.

Here is an example of “removing the filter” to apply in your own life

I was working with a client who was also working with a personal trainer. She recounted a story from the day she met him.

“He asked me, ‘So what’s your story?’ and I was just so taken aback. It’s such a big question. I didn’t even know where to start. So I just mumbled something awkwardly and then got quiet.”

“Well what was going through your head?”

“No that’s not true. Something was going through your head. You just didn’t think it was good enough to say. So what was your thought process?”

“I guess, ‘Oh wow this is awkward. I can’t even answer a simple question about my life! Now he probably thinks I am a weirdo…’”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean imagine what would have happened if you’d dropped the filter and said that to him. What would it have gone like?”

“Well I suppose I would have said, ‘Oh wow this is awkward. I can’t even answer a simple question about my life! Now you probably think I am a weirdo…”

“And what would he have done?”

“Laughed probably. And clarified his question.”

“Exactly! The point is that what you are thinking is always good enough – at least better than saying nothing because you only want to sound super clever all the time.”

The difficulty for everyone — my client, you, the best conversationalist on the planet — is not in coming up with something to say. It is in getting in touch with your thoughts and trusting yourself enough to simply state them. Will they always paint you as a genius? Certainly not! But by speaking, you’ve given both you and the person with whom you’re speaking a starting point. Now you have some Velcro hooks which either of you can latch onto.

So for example, the other day I was out speaking with a girl at a club. I didn’t have anything to say, but I noticed that she had a very genuine smile whenever she spoke to people. So I told her what was going through my head:

“You know you have such a genuine smile? It makes you look like a first grade teacher. I feel like I just want you to read me a picture book.”

When you remove the filter, what you say will rarely be brilliant. But it will provide you with enough “hooks” to start to restart conversation.

Note: if you’re absolutely stumped, I find a great way to start or restart a halting conversation is to simply say, “So what’s your story?”

Play “Reminds me of…” to re-spark dying conversation

So once you’ve cleared the filter, the goal is to drive conversation back to something that is fun or fascinating to both of you.

You don’t want to be trapped with just sticking to the literal words at hand. So if we’re talking about the weather today, I shouldn’t be limited to just talking about the weather this week. I want to be able to make conversational leaps.

One of the best tools to do this is, “Reminds me of.”

“Reminds me of” consists of thinking not just linearly (i.e. weather today > weather this week) but in larger leaps (i.e. weather today > gorgeous weather > the vacation I took last year to Costa Rica when it was sunny and then poured on us as we hiked up a mountain.)

“Reminds me of” can also be used to re-spark conversation with someone to whom you’ve already spoken. For instance, last night I was out at a bar with an extended group of friends. I was standing watching a drummer play a solo. We’d already exchanged pleasantries so I didn’t have any questions to ask many of the people. Still, to re-spark conversation, all I had to say was:

“This guy is amazing. He reminds me of Travis Barker from 182.”

“This club is so cool. It reminds me of a 1920’s speakeasy mixed with a rave.”

Use “reminds me of” in conjunction with the fun and values modes of conversation to rekindle any conversation and move it in a direction that will keep people captivated. It’s also a fantastic tool for connecting with someone with whom you may not have much in common because it allows you to trade stories based on whatever is happening around you.

Want to be able to ‘turn it on’ and wow any room at a moment’s notice?

Our 6 week program Charisma University will give you the tools to cultivate unshakeable confidence, tell stories that captivate your listener, and use powerful body language to draw in the people around you.

If you’ve been practicing your skills with women for a while, you will have come across this piece of advice for talking to ladies: “it doesn’t matter what you say, it’s how you say it.” While there is truth to it – your energy and delivery make or break your successful interaction, nonetheless, I am convinced that if you have nothing substantial to say to begin with, your interactions are going to lead nowhere. Agree? Lame platitudes like “where do you work”, “I like movies” or “I’m an accountant” only get you so far. I say: you should skip that stuff altogether and learn right away what makes an amazing conversation.

Today, I would like to talk to you about exciting conversation topics and interaction-starters. With this, you’ll never run out of things to say again. I believe that the bigger our repertoire of these is, the easier it will be to open up exciting conversations. Plus, the process keeps fuelling itself. If you bring up the right topics, people will tell you exciting stories from their lives, and with these, your repertoire will grow. “A friend told me this story (and I’d like to hear what you think)…”

Your repertoire for spellbinding conversation

Here’s a secret for ya: we all have resources of rivetting and enthralling stories inside of us. All we need to do is tap into them! We already introduced you to some key aspects of enthralling stories in our article “How To Tell a Story That Captivates a Woman’s Attention”, but let’s have another scoop:

How to keep a conversation going and never run out of things to say

  • Drama
  • Conflict
  • Emotion
  • Adventure
  • Excitement
  • Personal transformation (“I used to be insecure…”)

The more your story pulsates with life and emotion, the more gripping it will be – and once you open the portal with these notions, conversation will flow quite easily. You are triggering a human excitement in your listener that will evoke their own stories in them.

Listen and move forward

From there, it’s all about listening and moving forward: as your conversation partner replicates the spirit of your stories, you take the position of the listener. You take in what they say and let it trigger your next reaction: they bring up their family members, and you have a new topic to dissolve into.

Your vibe: be energetic!

Now here’s the catch: even the most exciting content can be excruciatingly boring if you tell it without any passion or devotion. On the other hand, if you sparkle with enthusiasm, you can even make your job as an accountant sound exciting (even though you’ll still want to pick better subjects if you have them). Here’s a tip: when you bring something up, lead into it with an energetic “oh my God!”.

But how do we open up this kind of conversation?

Here are a couple lines you can use to tap into the right kind of mood:

– Who do you love?
– What’s your ideal man like?
– What are you passionate about?
– What’s your favourite spot to get kissed?
– What’s the weirdest place you made love?

Human interest: your constant frame of mind

All this has to become your permanent frame of mind. If you have to consciously shift into “human interest” mode every time you’re about to interact with somebody, it’ll come off as fake. If the human, emotional side of things is your standard perspective, though, it’ll be natural.

I suggest you take some time to find stories from your life that had an emotional impact, were exciting, adventurous, led you into a personal transformation. Write them down, it’ll make it easier to remember them and you can refresh them at will. As you accumulate interactions, you’ll never run out of things to talk about: you open up to people, and as they open up to you, they automatically contribute stories to your repertoire. When it grows, you will have better and better tools for intriguing conversation.

How do you guys never run out of things to say?

Think of conversations like a Venn Diagram. In one circle is shit that you think is interesting. In another circle is shit that SHE thinks is interesting. Your goal is to shift the conversation to topics where the circles overlap.

If you just talk about shit that only SHE thinks is interesting, she will lose interest because you won’t be into it. She will also be able to tell that you are just pandering to her cuz you’ll be saying shit like “tell me about your cat.”

If you talk about shit that only you’re interested in, then she’ll lose interest because it’ll bore here.

So you have to find the middle of the Venn Diagram.

Of course, it’s easy to know what you’re interested in. But figuring out what she’s interested in is a little harder. Sometimes she’ll just tell you but part of it requires you to read her.

How to keep a conversation going and never run out of things to say?

every time a topic is losing momentum and repeating a bit just switch topic to the first tangent that becomes available.

“heh yeah mand burgers are the best. ‘specially with cheese.”

Find the best way to never run out of things to say in conversation with your crush. These conversation tips and topics will help you confidently talk to the guy or girl you like.

For some people setting up a conversation can be the most difficult step in socializing or wanting to hook up with someone. We often think that all of our conversation topics are boring or unattractive to others, but there are a number of things you can do to get conversation topics that might attract the person you are like. If you do not know how to start talking to someone we leave you a few tips.

Have confidence in yourself

It is time to let shyness and show the world that you are a great and very interesting person. Do not limit your ability to socialize with others for fear of being rejected. Have security in your personality and transmitting that energy will be pleasing to all. To tackle the feeling nervousness, you should believe in yourself that you are a strong person. If you talk to your crush with low confidence then this will definitely not make you completely focus on the conversation. With confidence you can come up with plenty of topics and never run out of things to say in conversation with your crush.

Break the ice

In a conversation the most difficult thing is to break the ice. Once this is done simply show yourself genuinely and interested and you will see how the quality of the subjects is getting better and increases your confidence much more. If you have never introduced yourself to your crush then simply go and let him/her know who you are and keep the conversation general. Now from coming conversations you can bring in some interested topics to make your crush feel connected to you.

Ask key and follow-up questions

Open and basic questions like: where were you born? Was it a beautiful place? Were your parents born there too? Do you have any hobbies? Do you practice any sport? With these types of questions, long and interesting topics can arise, because the person you are talking to will feel very good to see that you are interested in her/him. If you never run out of things to say in conversation then an important thing is bring up questions, let your crush answer and tell him/her your story related to the question. This will keep your conversation run long and keep your crush interested.

Avoid closed questions

The closed questions are those that can be answered only with “yes” or “no”, an example would be do you live in this city? These kinds of questions give the end to a conversation that could have spread far more. The main problem with closed question is that it ends too fast and to hold the conversation you need something which can keep both the parties interested. Also, asking too many closed questions just to talk to your crush will make the guy/girl feel like an interview. It kills the charm of conversation and so you use it at minimum.

Time and weather will always be a good start

If you do not know how to start a conversation, you can go to the classic and not so complicated: “Sorry you could tell me the time?” Or “It’s getting very hot here, we should be at 30 degrees”, normally the person will continue with the talk and from there will be triggered the other subjects of conversation. This trick is to be used when you meet some stranger on the street. Use it to break the ice and continue with interesting topics.

Be as kind as you can be

Kindness is one of the values most appreciated by all. Being kind you will get the attention of that person and it will be much easier to establish a good topic of conversation. The sense of humor can also influence positively compared to a person very moody and arrogant. A kind, fun and spontaneous person is attractive to hold a conversation, a friendship or even something else.

Investigate what interests you have in common

This part is extremely important because the more common interests you and the person have, the easier it will be to realize a good topic of conversation. Find out if you like art, music, cinema, travel, study interests or what is your favorite dish or place. According to this it will be easier to specify a theme based on their common tastes. This way for the current session you will never run out of things to say in conversation with your crush. All you need to just get to know something the guy/girl likes and you like it too.

Pass a compliment once in a while

A compliment will always be a good way to progress in a conversation. Praising the person will make them feel great and this will keep them interested in chatting with you. If you tell a person that he/she has a very nice haircut, this surely will be appreciated by them and it will be forgotten. The conversation will take a turn and continue progressively. In first few conversation, don’t compliment something which can make the other feel offend or uncomfortable. Complimenting the beauty of eyes, smile, dress or anything particular you find good on them will be enough.

Never lie to your crush

Do not lie and do not pretend as this is counterproductive. Especially if you’re one of the people who do not know how to lie, you’d better not. In search of the acceptance of the people we usually go to the lie, pretending situations or posing as people we are not. The best will always be to be ourselves and the let your crush decide if they want to relate to us or not.

Important rule of conversation

Apply the rules of the good listener and the good speaker. It is time to use that education that our parents taught us, listen and then speak. Do not try to interrupt, this is very frowned upon and moreover you will only make the person lose the sense of what he/she was saying and that is where a conversation begins to die. Speak slowly, listen carefully when spoken to and respect the dialogue time of each person.

How to keep a conversation going and never run out of things to say

We’ve all been there before — you’re in the conversation, things are humming along nicely, and then out of nowhere, the awkward silence rears its head.

At that moment, your mind goes completely blank, you don’t know what to say, and you can sense the other person’s eyes wandering as they look for someone else to talk to.

That scenario sucks. So here are 5 tips to make sure that you never run out of things to say in conversation again.

1. When you find yourself in that situation where your mind has gone blank, play Reminds Me of.

That just means that you look to the environment around you and say, “You know, that reminds me of. ” and then fill in the blank. It’s great for opening new conversational threads and it can also work as a follow-up when someone finishes telling a story which is how many groups of friends interact all the time.

That’s because people are drawn to others who they feel are similar to themselves and related stories can build that bridge — just be sure NOT to repeatedly make your story superior to theirs or else you can feel like one-upping.

2. When you ask questions, keep them open-ended as often as possible.

So rather than saying, “Oh, you’re from Toronto. Do you like it there?” you might say, “How do you like Toronto? I’m curious to hear more about it.” The former question invites a one-word response and then awkward silence.

The latter gets the other person talking about the things that they like which is going to open up more conversational threads. Also, just remember the rule that every three-year-old knows about conversation which is that merely asking “why” is a great way to get people to open up more.

So when someone mentions that they are consultant for instance, you might ask, “Why did you decide to get into consulting?” To be clear, unlike three-year-olds, you don’t have to say the word ‘why’ over and over and over.

But drilling down into their motivations will often get you a deeper connection in conversation.

3. For the worst-case scenario when conversation just flat-out stalls, use revival questions.

These are non sequiturs that bring conversation back from the dead. Here’s three of my favorites — if you’re in a new group and conversation dies after initial pleasantries, a great revival question is, “How do you guys all know one another?” There’s almost always some kind of story that conversation can build from.

If you’re only speaking to one person, you can say instead, “So what’s your story?” The great thing about this question is that it is so open-ended that the other person will probably guide you towards the topics that they want to talk about usually responding with something like, “You mean what do I do for work or what do I like to do for fun?”

Their tone of voice and enthusiasm will usually tell you the best angle of conversation to continue with. Lastly, for people you already know well, ask them about their exciting plans for the future. This one is nice because it is endlessly renewable which makes it great for connecting with people in the office or wherever you work.

4. Make a complimentary cold read.

So if someone is particularly smiley, you might say, “You look like the type who would be great with kids.” Or if they’re super strong, you might say, “You look like you’re pretty into fitness.”

If you get it right, they’re probably going to open up and tell you more about it but even if you’re wrong, you can talk about what it is that gave you that impression in the first place. Either way, you’ve got new conversational material to work with.

5. Flip the script so that you’re not the one worried about running out of things to say.

Instead, allow the other person to move the conversation forward by getting more comfortable with silence.

Seriously, thirty seconds might feel like a long time but if you can just take a deep breath while maintaining easy eye contact, more often than not, the other person will make a comment or ask you a question.

Or if you really want to encourage them to continue, repeat back the last few words that they said. This mirroring invites them to elaborate and can often get people to open up in very powerful ways.

How to keep a conversation going and never run out of things to say

So now you’re talking, conversation is flowing nicely, and you feel like you’re really starting to form a connection with this person…

But what happens when after 10 minutes, that dreaded moment rears it’s head?

The awkward silence!

What should you do when you feel like a particular conversational topic has expired? And how do you never run out of things to say so you keep people engaged and interested?

Well, let’s take a step back to understand the awkward silence…

Who does the awkward silence seem to occur most with: strangers or friends? Undoubtedly, strangers. But why? You’d think there would be so much more interesting ground to cover with strangers. With friends, you know how they feel about the most important topics. You’re left with just random stuff that pops into your head. Yet you still can find yourselves talking for hours in a stream of unrelated randomness. Without any sort of agenda, conversation just flows.

This is exactly the point. When you feel like you’ve run out of things to say with strangers, you haven’t actually run out of things to say. You’ve simply run out of things that have passed your internal filter of “good enough to say to a stranger!”

This is why you can talk for hours nothing with people you know well. Why you can turn a conversation about “nothing” into something you both really cherish. It’s not just because you have common interests. It is because neither of you has a very high threshold for what is “good enough” to say. If something pops into your head, you blurt it out.

This is also why it is much easier to speak to people when you’ve had a few drinks. It’s not that you’ve suddenly become more clever or interesting (sorry to burst your bubble!) It’s that you’ve lowered your inhibitions. You say what comes to your mind without thinking if it is “good enough” to vocalize.

The key here is that you are not anticipating too far ahead. You need to trust yourself to adapt on the fly. You need to remove the filter.

How to keep a conversation going and never run out of things to say

Here is an example of “removing the filter” to apply in your own life

I was working with a client who was also working with a personal trainer. She recounted a story from the day she met him.

“He asked me, ‘So what’s your story?’ and I was just so taken aback. It’s such a big question. I didn’t even know where to start. So I just mumbled something awkwardly and then got quiet.”

“Well what was going through your head?”

“No that’s not true. Something was going through your head. You just didn’t think it was good enough to say. So what was your thought process?”

“I guess, ‘Oh wow this is awkward. I can’t even answer a simple question about my life! Now he probably thinks I am a weirdo…’”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean imagine what would have happened if you’d dropped the filter and said that to him. What would it have gone like?”

“Well I suppose I would have said, ‘Oh wow this is awkward. I can’t even answer a simple question about my life! Now you probably think I am a weirdo…”

“And what would he have done?”

“Laughed probably. And clarified his question.”

“Exactly! The point is that what you are thinking is always good enough – at least better than saying nothing because you only want to sound super clever all the time.”

The difficulty for everyone—my client, you, the best conversationalist on the planet—is not in coming up with something to say. It is in getting in touch with your thoughts and trusting yourself enough to simply state them. Will they always paint you as a genius? Certainly not! But by speaking, you’ve given both you and the person with whom you’re speaking a starting point. Now you have some Velcro hooks which either of you can latch onto.

So for example, the other day I was out speaking with a girl at a club. I didn’t have anything to say, but I noticed that she had a very genuine smile whenever she spoke to people. So I told her what was going through my head:

“You know you have such a genuine smile? It makes you look like a first grade teacher. I feel like I just want you to read me a picture book.”

When you remove the filter, what you say will rarely be brilliant. But it will provide you with enough “hooks” to start to restart conversation.

Note: if you’re absolutely stumped, I find a great way to start or restart a halting conversation is to simply say, “So what’s your story?”

Play “Reminds me of…” to re-spark dying conversation

So once you’ve cleared the filter, the goal is to drive conversation back to something that is fun or fascinating to both of you.

You don’t want to be trapped with just sticking to the literal words at hand. So if we’re talking about the weather today, I shouldn’t be limited to just talking about the weather this week. I want to be able to make conversational leaps.

One of the best tools to do this is, “Reminds me of.”

“Reminds me of” consists of thinking not just linearly (i.e. weather today > weather this week) but in larger leaps (i.e. weather today > gorgeous weather > the vacation I took last year to Costa Rica when it was sunny and then poured on us as we hiked up a mountain.)

“Reminds me of” can also be used to re-spark conversation with someone to whom you’ve already spoken. For instance, last night I was out at a bar with an extended group of friends. I was standing watching a drummer play a solo. We’d already exchanged pleasantries so I didn’t have any questions to ask many of the people. Still, to re-spark conversation, all I had to say was:

“This guy is amazing. He reminds me of Travis Barker from 182.”

“This club is so cool. It reminds me of a 1920’s speakeasy mixed with a rave.”

Use “reminds me of” in conjunction with the fun and values modes of conversation to rekindle any conversation and move it in a direction that will keep people captivated. It’s also a fantastic tool for connecting with someone with whom you may not have much in common because it allows you to trade stories based on whatever is happening around you.

How to keep a conversation going and never run out of things to say

So now you’re talking, conversation is flowing nicely, and you feel like you’re really starting to form a connection with this person…

But what happens when after 10 minutes, that dreaded moment rears it’s head?

The awkward silence!

What should you do when you feel like a particular conversational topic has expired? And how do you never run out of things to say so you keep people engaged and interested?

Well, let’s take a step back to understand the awkward silence…

Who does the awkward silence seem to occur most with: strangers or friends? Undoubtedly, strangers. But why? You’d think there would be so much more interesting ground to cover with strangers. With friends, you know how they feel about the most important topics. You’re left with just random stuff that pops into your head. Yet you still can find yourselves talking for hours in a stream of unrelated randomness. Without any sort of agenda, conversation just flows.

This is exactly the point. When you feel like you’ve run out of things to say with strangers, you haven’t actually run out of things to say. You’ve simply run out of things that have passed your internal filter of “good enough to say to a stranger!”

This is why you can talk for hours nothing with people you know well. Why you can turn a conversation about “nothing” into something you both really cherish. It’s not just because you have common interests. It is because neither of you has a very high threshold for what is “good enough” to say. If something pops into your head, you blurt it out.

This is also why it is much easier to speak to people when you’ve had a few drinks. It’s not that you’ve suddenly become more clever or interesting (sorry to burst your bubble!) It’s that you’ve lowered your inhibitions. You say what comes to your mind without thinking if it is “good enough” to vocalize.

The key here is that you are not anticipating too far ahead. You need to trust yourself to adapt on the fly. You need to remove the filter.

How to keep a conversation going and never run out of things to say

Here is an example of “removing the filter” to apply in your own life

I was working with a client who was also working with a personal trainer. She recounted a story from the day she met him.

“He asked me, ‘So what’s your story?’ and I was just so taken aback. It’s such a big question. I didn’t even know where to start. So I just mumbled something awkwardly and then got quiet.”

“Well what was going through your head?”

“No that’s not true. Something was going through your head. You just didn’t think it was good enough to say. So what was your thought process?”

“I guess, ‘Oh wow this is awkward. I can’t even answer a simple question about my life! Now he probably thinks I am a weirdo…’”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean imagine what would have happened if you’d dropped the filter and said that to him. What would it have gone like?”

“Well I suppose I would have said, ‘Oh wow this is awkward. I can’t even answer a simple question about my life! Now you probably think I am a weirdo…”

“And what would he have done?”

“Laughed probably. And clarified his question.”

“Exactly! The point is that what you are thinking is always good enough – at least better than saying nothing because you only want to sound super clever all the time.”

The difficulty for everyone—my client, you, the best conversationalist on the planet—is not in coming up with something to say. It is in getting in touch with your thoughts and trusting yourself enough to simply state them. Will they always paint you as a genius? Certainly not! But by speaking, you’ve given both you and the person with whom you’re speaking a starting point. Now you have some Velcro hooks which either of you can latch onto.

So for example, the other day I was out speaking with a girl at a club. I didn’t have anything to say, but I noticed that she had a very genuine smile whenever she spoke to people. So I told her what was going through my head:

“You know you have such a genuine smile? It makes you look like a first grade teacher. I feel like I just want you to read me a picture book.”

When you remove the filter, what you say will rarely be brilliant. But it will provide you with enough “hooks” to start to restart conversation.

Note: if you’re absolutely stumped, I find a great way to start or restart a halting conversation is to simply say, “So what’s your story?”

Play “Reminds me of…” to re-spark dying conversation

So once you’ve cleared the filter, the goal is to drive conversation back to something that is fun or fascinating to both of you.

You don’t want to be trapped with just sticking to the literal words at hand. So if we’re talking about the weather today, I shouldn’t be limited to just talking about the weather this week. I want to be able to make conversational leaps.

One of the best tools to do this is, “Reminds me of.”

“Reminds me of” consists of thinking not just linearly (i.e. weather today > weather this week) but in larger leaps (i.e. weather today > gorgeous weather > the vacation I took last year to Costa Rica when it was sunny and then poured on us as we hiked up a mountain.)

“Reminds me of” can also be used to re-spark conversation with someone to whom you’ve already spoken. For instance, last night I was out at a bar with an extended group of friends. I was standing watching a drummer play a solo. We’d already exchanged pleasantries so I didn’t have any questions to ask many of the people. Still, to re-spark conversation, all I had to say was:

“This guy is amazing. He reminds me of Travis Barker from 182.”

“This club is so cool. It reminds me of a 1920’s speakeasy mixed with a rave.”

Use “reminds me of” in conjunction with the fun and values modes of conversation to rekindle any conversation and move it in a direction that will keep people captivated. It’s also a fantastic tool for connecting with someone with whom you may not have much in common because it allows you to trade stories based on whatever is happening around you.

How to keep a conversation going and never run out of things to say

Once you found the courage to say “Hi!” to a girl you’ll be facing one of the most common difficulties men have with women: getting into-, and keeping up a conversation.

You are probably looking for a girl who shares some of your interests and a girl you will never feel bored with. Such a person makes everything easy for you. Including a conversation.

So why should you struggle to get into a relationship with a girl, you don’t even feel comfortable talking to? There is no need to do that.

If you make use of the tips below and the conversation is still not going anywhere there is a phrase you may remember from an earlier post: “It’s ok!” Excuse yourself and just walk away. By doing that you will only seem more attractive. So don’t force it! If the chemistry isn’t right, deal with it.

“With the right girl, everything is easy.”

Once you have realized it´s ok not to be a great fit with everyone, you will also lose the sense of neediness women can smell from miles away. Once you install this thought in your mind, the only important thing is to approach a woman with confidence and authenticity. You see, everything is leading back to your mindset again.

Some useful tips for a successful conversation

Be honest

Don’t rethink every thought. If something pops into your mind say it! It’s a little cocky? If it’s honest that’s ok. Remember: It’s always better to say what comes to mind, screw up and apologize for it than to stay safe. Staying safe and filtering what you want to say is the highest risk you can take because it takes away all the controversy and forces you to have the same standard, shallow conversations all the time. Mark Manson cites in his fantastic book “Models” Robert Glover:

“Humans are attracted to each other’s rough edges.”

Speak your mind and your rough edges will show.

Listen

If you listen carefully you will not run out of things to say that fast. Try not to drift away. You’re busy listening, so leave your thoughts aside!

Talk about things you like

You’ll probably be most confident talking about the things you love. Excitement is infectious!

Don’t interview her

Ask her about her life, but also respond to what she is saying. It´s not an interview and not a monolog! You can avoid interviewing her by asking open-ended questions. Example:
“What do you like most about your job?”, “What was the best part of your vacation?”… I think you see where this is going.

If you want some inspiration on what you could ask her, here is a list with a ton of open-ended questions, we’ve put together for you.

Make her laugh

If there is any chance for you to make her laugh, do it!

Don’t use canned lines

Don’t use memorized conversations like routines or openers. It will always feel a little fake to her.

Compliment her

There is an easy trick when it comes to compliments and again it´s called honesty. Maybe look for details you like. Her earrings or the way her lip is shaking when she laughs. It’s ok if she is a little embarrassed. 😉 Another tip: Beautiful girls like to be complimented on their personal qualities.

Tease her

But always stay charming. Hint: teasing can be softened through touching.

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How to keep a conversation going and never run out of things to say

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How to keep a conversation going and never run out of things to say

Do you run out of things to say on a date?

I believe most people run out of things to say because they’re worried about running out of things to say. If you can get yourself focused on other things you’re already halfway there.

So let’s get into the key reasons why you’re running out of things to say on a date.

1. You see her as very much of a stranger

You think that you have nothing in common with. So for that reason, people get into a very formal conversation which makes everything awkward because of the tone of the conversation.

It’s much easier to run out of things to say because you’re basically assuming you’re talking to a complete stranger.

What you need to do if you want to get effective at this is to assume that she’s at least friend material.

So assume she’s a friend and you’ll see you’ll just assume that you have things in common.

So here’s the trick for that even if you meet a girl for the first time.

Assume you’ve already met her a few times try it out and see how it changes how relaxed you feel around her.

2. You think too much

You think you have to try to come across as clever a more sophisticated more special more intelligent than you actually are.

Here’s what happens when you think you have to be the smartest person in the room or you have to impress her with your intelligence or your high flow and conversation.

You freak out and you overthink everything.

You need to learn to accept yourself as you are, to appreciate yourself as you are, and to realize that on a date when you’re trying to be something else that you’re not then you’re always going to give off that vibe that you’re sort of trying too hard.

One of the things women are most attracted to is authenticity you’ll find out that actually who you are is good enough and you’ll actually realize that women are far more interested than you when you’re just kicking back and you when you’re just being what we call yourself.

3. You’re are censoring yourself too much

Censoring is when you second guess everything.

You’re saying you’re stopping yourself from saying whatever comes to your mind for fear of looking stupid for fear of being weird for fear of saying the wrong thing.

The easiest way to stop censoring yourself is to take a mobile phone and you basically set a timer for 5 minutes a day in the morning and you just speak out loud without stopping.

You don’t censor yourself you practice speaking out loud whatever comes to your mind you just keep continuously speaking.

Doing that helps you to practice this so this is really a useful technique to use.

4. You freak out because you think the conversation is the only thing that matters

It’s not. Everything else matters.

The conversations, the words you’re actually saying are sort of a byproduct of what you’re experiencing.

It’s far more important that you take everything in that you’re taking in what she’s doing, what she’s saying, that your body language works, that you are you’re having eye contact, you’re having fun and you’re doing all kinds of things all of that is important.

The conversation is just a byproduct of that.

So your conversation is really what you’re reacting to when you’re speaking to a girl a.

Not of people think it’s a date so therefore now we have to focus on the conversation all the time it’s not that.

It’s everything else and the conversation is just something that happens when you hang out with your friends, you’re doing things and you’re talking at the same time you don’t over plan your conversation, Do you?

So bear that in mind when it comes to dates.

5. You feel the pressure of doing it all yourself

It’s not your job to run the conversation by yourself.

It’s not your job to make it all happen by thinking it up in your head.

If the girl doesn’t keep the conversation going then you know maybe you’re in the wrong place with her.

Maybe you should be hanging out with somebody else because you know she’s bored or she is bored.

A conversation happens between 2 people or 3 people or whatever many people are there.

So it’s not all just your job to keep it going.

6. You’re not really listening

You’re not listening to her, you’re not listening to anything else that’s going on, you’re not hearing what she’s really saying, you’re not picking up on her intentions.

You don’t see what her face looks like because there’s so much in the head about thinking what to say next or how to not run out of things to say okay.

What you really need to do is to listen well to what she’s saying and pick things up.

Picking up things and conversations is a crucial key and very simple thing that you can do.

The other thing is to listen to what you’re hearing around. You see what you’re seeing around you and react to that and that makes your conversation.

So use your senses and use your senses as well when you’re listening to her when you see her when you react to her and that’s where the conversation comes from.

7. You’re just not curious enough

You’re just not curious enough or fascinated enough with people, with things.

If you’re on a date with a girl you haven’t met yet or you use on a second third date wouldn’t you be curious about her.

Wouldn’t you be sort of fascinated with little things that she’s doing especially if you’re attracted to her?

The date is not about you managing the conversation perfectly.

The date is all about the dance of getting to know each other.

So let yourself be curious and let yourself be fascinated if you’re curious about her you’re going to find ways of engaging in the conversation.

Use that curiosity that natural curiosity.

Sometimes guys just forget that they’re allowed to be curious in this process and have fun.

If conversations with women aren’t fun for you’re doing it wrong.

The whole conversation bit is only there for you to have a good time.

You have a good time to build an attraction to flirt with her and to take the whole thing to the next level.

Make sure you make a good connection with her.

Become comfortable with her and make her comfortable as well.

Mental Health & Well-Being

How to keep a conversation going and never run out of things to say

How to keep a conversation going and never run out of things to say

I used to blank out frequently during conversations with people. Usually right i n the middle of a conversation.

It was frustrating, to say the least. A tragic combination of shame and helplessness would come over me.

I would have a hard time finding the right words. I would like to say something but I did not know what to say. And the craziest part was that the more I tried, the more I would draw a blank, which resulted in not having anything to say.

Note: Sometimes silence is necessary and I will cover this in another article…

Outside, I smiled and nodded. But inside, I was going crazy. I just needed something to say!

“the more I tried, the more my mind blanked and I would have nothing to say.”

If you can relate to this keep reading.

UNTIL I LEARNED A TECHNIQUE CALLED CONVERSATION THREADING

It’s a technique you can use in any conversation. This allows you to relax and think easily about what to say next.

This is the basic concept: when you talk to someone, a thread is a word that interests you.

Anything that causes something in your brain: a memory, an opinion or a feeling, for example.

During a conversation, there will be dozens of discussions. So listen carefully. Each word can be a thread.

And spinning a conversation is simply pulling a thread with a statement or question. Then, when someone is talking, listen to a word that interests you and use it to continue the conversation.

So, for example, let’s say someone says …

“TODAY I AM GOING TO THE PARK WITH MY DOG.”

A short sentence but full of tons of information. In this sentence, there are 3 discussions that I could launch. And each of these opens a complete line of conversation.

  1. YOU CAN TALK ABOUT TODAY
  • Today is the ideal day for the park.
  • Do you have any other plans for today?
  1. YOU CAN TALK ABOUT PARKS
  • In what park did you go?
  • I went to Yosemite Park last year.
  1. WHERE CAN YOU TALK TO DOGS
  • What kind of dog do you have?
  • Dogs are the best…
  • My friend has an awesome hunting dog.

This creates natural transitions from one subject to another.

Fluid and effortless conversations are the best. That’s what we are aiming for.

Most people worry about what to say next. They end up not really listening and then all those rich conversation topics float away with the breeze.

Try to notice anything that wakes something up in your mind. Try not to filter and let the conversation flow.

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